Total pages in book: 76
Estimated words: 73010 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 365(@200wpm)___ 292(@250wpm)___ 243(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 73010 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 365(@200wpm)___ 292(@250wpm)___ 243(@300wpm)
They have every right to be concerned about their brother because I hurt him deeply, whether he admits it or not. What they don’t know is he hurt me too. He didn’t fight for me to stay, even if he was right about experiencing the entertainment industry for myself instead of only dreaming about it. But in this scenario, my hurt matters less, and I deserve no sympathy for the ultimate decision I made.
I clear the empties from the bar top as I watch John follow the last stragglers to the door. Walter is slurring his words, and John suggests giving him a ride home. But Beth offers instead, throwing me a knowing look over her shoulder.
John locks the door behind them, then leans against the frame and takes a breather. He’s tired. I can see the shadows under his eyes, but he’s still charming and gorgeous as ever—maybe even more so now. Still takes my breath away. Even knowing where we ended up, I’d still marry him all over again—though maybe not on the fly like that, and maybe not yet. But I still cherish that he wanted to be mine. We were young and impulsive, but it remains the best day of my life. While walking away was the worst.
“We haven’t been that busy in a while.” As he approaches, I toss him a clean rag, glad he’s not ushering me out as well. I would insist on helping anyway. “Must be you.”
“Why?”
“Why do you think? A new person to buzz about.”
“Pretty sad if all it takes is me showing up in Aqua Vista again to get them out.”
“It’s that charisma. You’ve always drawn people, like moths to a flame.”
“Is that right?” I smirk because John has never been able to see how his own charm is a draw. “Even when I was in trouble?”
“That’s why Principal Matthews let you get away with shit.”
“How come my own father didn’t?” I mutter bitterly.
“He didn’t see how special you are. How you light up every room you’re in. People like him don’t deserve children.”
“Unfortunately, there’s too many of him in the world.” I sigh. “And I’m a dime a dozen in Hollywood.”
“Is that really how you feel?”
“Sometimes. Here, I was a big fish in a small pond, but in LA, it’s been a bit tougher to catch a break.”
“Why haven’t you shared this with me? I’m your husband and your friend. I—”
“You think I want to show you I failed after hurting you so much?”
“You’ve got nothing to prove to me.” He squares his jaw. “Only to yourself.”
“Logically, I know that. I… I’m just not sure if I can forgive myself.”
“For what?”
I give him a piercing look. “For turning your life upside down.”
“There was no other option. You would’ve withered here.”
“Of course, there was an option. We were married.”
“Are married,” he counters. “And married couples sacrifice things all the time.”
My gut churns. “We sacrificed a life together.”
He averts his eyes, but I catch the flash of pain. “Is what it is.”
“Well, maybe it’s time. To let you go. So someone else can give you what you need. Make you happy.” He screws his eyes shut as I force the words out. “That said, I, uh, brought the divorce papers.”
His breath hitches.
“Haven’t been able to fill out the formal petition—or file it, for that matter. I figure it’s best if we do it together.”
His eyes meet mine, and he steps closer. “Why haven’t you been able to?”
My heart trembles as I admit, “Because then we’re really over.”
“Aren’t we already over?” he mutters, but I see the flicker of affection in his irises.
“Yeah, I suppose we are. You belong here. I belong somewhere else.”
“You fit in here just fine, but it wasn’t what you needed.”
“I was an outsider in this town. Still am.”
“Not sure I believe that, but so are a lot of people. Take Aaron, for example.”
“He looks more part of Aqua Vista than I ever did.”
“Your grandfather would say otherwise. Your family has roots here, even if your father never embraced them.” His eyes soften. “My parents would say the same.”
“Your parents treated me like one of their own, but I disappointed them.”
“They knew we were both hurting. Mom told me privately it was the right thing to do—to let you go.”
I inhale sharply. “She did?”
“Apparently, my parents split up much the same way when they were young. And she figured out her own path before they reconnected. The only difference is they weren’t married. We got married on a whim, but I still don’t regret it. Maybe if I had a redo, I’d hold the ceremony in front of friends and family. Something I regret now that my parents have passed.”
I nod. We celebrated in their backyard upon our return, but I understand the sentiment and how special it would’ve been to them.