Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 101662 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 508(@200wpm)___ 407(@250wpm)___ 339(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 101662 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 508(@200wpm)___ 407(@250wpm)___ 339(@300wpm)
“I know, sweetheart. I’m sorry it took me so long to get here.” I hesitated as I bit my bottom lip. “Can we have a grown-up conversation?”
She glanced my way and narrowed her eyes. “I’ve been wanting you to do that for years. I’m not a silly kid anymore, Mom.”
“I know, but sometimes when I look at you, I still see my little five-year-old girl who I want to protect from all harm, no matter what.”
“Yeah, but then who’s protecting you?”
I smiled a sad smile and kissed her forehead. A small sigh rippled between my lips. “I’m leaving your father.”
She sat up slightly, making the hammock rock more. “What? Really?”
I nodded. “Yeah. But it’s complicated. When your father and I married, we signed a prenuptial agreement and it states that if there were a divorce, he would get full custody of you.”
“What? No way. I don’t want to go with him. I hate him,” she barked out, sitting up completely, almost tossing the hammock all the way over. She stood. “He can’t do that. You’re my mom.”
“I know, sweetheart. It’s just a paragraph in a document that he has hung over my head for a long time. But…I spoke with a lawyer. He told me that a clause in a prenuptial agreement attempting to stipulate the rights of a stepparent in a future child custody case would likely not be enforced. There’s a lot of complexities when it comes to parental rights and custody cases.”
The fear in Ava’s eyes settled. “Oh. Okay, good.”
“But if your father gets his way, he might drag this out and keep his threats coming. You might have to testify in court that you want to be with me. I know that’s a lot to ask—”
“I’ll do it,” she cut in. “I’ll do anything for you.”
The tears burned at the back of my eyes as the words left her mouth. “I don’t want you to feel responsible for making sure I’m okay, Ava. All I care about is you and your safety.”
“You are my safety, Mom. Besides, you said forever, right?”
I stood and walked over to her. I held a pinkie out in her direction. “Forever.”
She wrapped hers around mine. “Forever,” she echoed.
I pulled her into a hug and held her for the longest time. “I love you, Ava Melanie.”
“I love you, too, Mom. And I’m really proud of you.”
I’m really proud of you.
That was the line that made the tears fall.
31
Gabriel
I was miserable without them. There was no getting around the fact that not seeing Kierra and Ava was affecting me more than I thought possible. I’d tried to focus on anything other than the fact that my world felt dark without them, but everything felt empty. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t work, I couldn’t even think.
It had been three weeks since Kierra told me to stay away. Three weeks of me worrying about her well-being. Three weeks of me thinking that Henry might’ve done something to hurt her and Ava. Three miserable weeks of me staying up all night, terrified that I may get a call that something awful had happened.
Rosie was kind enough to give me daily updates, letting me know that she’d been checking in on Kierra. She assured me that everything was okay, but I didn’t feel that way. It was almost impossible to explain, but I felt as if something terrible was happening.
I may not have had my memories with Kierra from our youth, but I felt her within me. I knew it didn’t make sense, but I swore over the past years my heart only beat because somewhere in my consciousness I knew hers was out there beating, too. And I currently felt her heart breaking. As she fell apart, my own chest ached. As she cried, my own eyes leaked.
It made no sense.
I made no sense.
But I knew she wasn’t okay.
No matter what she’d told Rosie.
“Have you heard from her?” Mom asked as she walked into my office. She looked at me the same way she’d been staring my way over the past few weeks—as if I were a sad, abandoned puppy dog who had no clue how to find my way home. We hadn’t spoken since I’d learned about Elijah, and I wasn’t ready to speak to her on the topic. But I was certain Bobby had informed her of what was going on with Kierra.
I shook my head, knowing she was speaking of Kierra. “No. I haven’t.”
She took a step toward me. “Son—”
“Don’t,” I urged. I couldn’t look at her. The mere idea of her still made my stomach turn. “I’m not ready for this conversation, Mom.”
“I know. I…” she started, but her voice cracked and faded away. I still didn’t look her way, because if I had, I would’ve felt bad. I would’ve saw the hurt in her eyes and felt the need to comfort her. I wasn’t ready for that. I wasn’t ready to forgive. I wasn’t ready to heal. I wasn’t ready to hold a conversation with her that would either move us forward or forever tear us apart.