Total pages in book: 152
Estimated words: 145155 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 726(@200wpm)___ 581(@250wpm)___ 484(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 145155 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 726(@200wpm)___ 581(@250wpm)___ 484(@300wpm)
For the first time in seven years I am proud that I didn’t give into desire and that I kept myself only for him. I haven’t told him that fact yet, I’m not sure if I ever will. At first, I kept the secret so that he wouldn’t be worried about hurting me when we had sex. I didn’t want to be lacking or for him to have a preconceived idea that I was inexperienced in bed. But after last night I’m pretty sure he’s not being gentle anymore. Actually I’m sure of it. The man’s a deviant, and the thought brings a satisfied smile to my face. Our relationship is complicated. My darkest fear is that we are not going to make it. But I owe it to myself to try. I could never move on knowing I didn’t give it my best shot. I just wish we didn’t have so many things against us; it’s exhausting. I want to be with him when he wakes but nature is screaming at me and I need to go to the bathroom.
I gently rise from bed and his arm feels around the bed for my body warmth. I smile as I rise from the bed and gingerly tiptoe to the bathroom. After the quickest wee in history I brush my teeth and sprint back to bed. He is still out cold. I lie and watch him for nearly an hour, my mind deep in thought. I don’t want him to fight with his mother over me. That’s the last thing I want. She’s trying to protect him and, in all honesty, if my son was embarking on a relationship like ours that was so passionate and volatile, I don’t know how I would react either. It’s obvious she thinks I am going to hurt him again. I wonder if he told her I never cheated on him all those years ago. I doubt she would have given him the chance to elaborate.
What about Brock? I wince as I remember that he is onto us. I wonder what happened last night between him and Joshua outside. Did they fight? Surely the bodyguards would have stopped it, wouldn’t they? That’s right, what’s with the bodyguard claiming to be mine? Seriously, that’s just way too much NCIS action, who in the hell would want to hurt me? Joshua has been watching too many movies. My eyes go back to the Adonis in my bed and I smile as I watch him. Am I the only woman deeply in love with him? Is Amelie in love with him? Is he in love with her? He told me last night that he is completely mine.
Please let that be true. He hasn’t told me how he feels about me, apart from the adore thing, but then adore isn’t love. We only have three more weeks together and we need to decide our future. I just wish we had more time to work this mess out.
He gently starts to wake, and I can’t help but smile, it’s like Christmas morning. He opens one eye and smiles a sleepy smile at me and pulls me into an embrace and kisses my forehead.
“Good morning, beautiful,” he whispers in a husky voice.
“Morning.” I lean in and kiss him softly on the lips. He smiles and keeps his eyes closed. I lie waiting for him to wake up but he’s still half asleep.
“Why are you so tired, baby?” I whisper.
“Hmm.” He smiles, still half asleep, and absentmindedly starts to run his fingers through my hair. He smiles and kisses my forehead once more, still with his eyes closed.
“Why are you so tired?” I ask again.
He smiles and huskily whispers. “This hot raving bitch I know keeps fighting with me about everything and I can’t sleep. I’ve hardly slept since Saturday.”
I smile a sad smile. “Joshua, why didn’t you just come over here?”
“Because I’m not putting up with your shit, that’s why.” He smiles, his eyes still closed.
My heart skips a beat. Am I torturing this poor guy with my dramatics? “Do you want coffee?” I ask.
He nods again with his eyes closed. “Yes, please.”
Fifteen minutes later I am seated at my breakfast bar when he saunters out in the hottest black underpants known to man and takes his coffee from the counter and sits on the breakfast stool. I take a sip, unsure how to broach this subject and totally distracted by his beauty. Underpants is a definite unfair advantage. I am painfully aware how easily our conversations turn into full-blown arguments.
“Does your mother know where you are?” He puts his head down and nods. “Josh, I don’t want you fighting with her over me.”
“Well, I am. So, too late.”
“Did you tell her?” He nods, and I wince. “How did she take it?”