Total pages in book: 94
Estimated words: 91164 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 456(@200wpm)___ 365(@250wpm)___ 304(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91164 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 456(@200wpm)___ 365(@250wpm)___ 304(@300wpm)
I watch her, touching her cheek, each bruise I see making me hate myself a little more.
Someone knocks softly on the door. I check the time. Nine o’clock. I get out of the bed, scrub my face, five o’clock shadow quickly turning into a full beard. I push a hand through my hair and pull on a T-shirt. I stripped it off last night to hold her to me. Skin to skin contact. I’m not sure it helped though. When I open the door, I see the doctor followed by another woman. A different nurse.
The doctor wishes me a good morning although her smile tells me she’s wary. She glances over my shoulder at the sleeping Allegra. “I’m sorry about the nurse,” she whispers. “It won’t happen again.”
I nod, exhausted. “Coffee,” I tell the soldier behind her.
“Yes, sir.”
“May I see her?”
I move to let her enter. “Don’t wake her. She’s finally quieted.”
The doctor looks Allegra over. She’s careful not to wake her. She checks the bandage. It’ll need to be changed, but I tell her I’ll do it later after Allegra wakes. She wants to argue with me that I should let the nurse handle it, but I trust myself more than I do any nurse. When she’s finished, she promises once more that this one won’t fall asleep. She leaves and I tell the nurse to wait in the kitchen until I need her.
I’m about to return to the bedroom, coffee in hand, when my phone rings. It’s Angelo.
“Hello?” I answer.
“Amal and Daniel Lombardi just turned up.”
“Where?”
“Florida. They’re with Lombardi’s mother.”
“So their grandmother?”
“It would appear so.”
“Why haven’t we looked there? Why don’t I know about her?”
“They’re estranged. Have been since Malek turned eighteen. It’s the first time she’s meeting her grandchildren.”’
“Hm. Let’s keep eyes on them.”
“Already done.”
“Anything on Malek?”
“Not yet. You know I’ll call if there is.”
I disconnect and return to the bedroom coffee in hand and sit down on the chair to watch her. I sip my coffee and consider this development.
Almost an hour later, Allegra begins to stir. My heartbeats pick up in anticipation of her waking. Allegra’s eyes flutter open. She doesn’t move at first just lies there looking up at the ceiling. I stand to go to her. When she sees the movement, she startles, her entire body suddenly on full alert, eyes locked on me.
I stop walking and hold my hands up, palms to her. “It’s me. It’s Cassian. It’s all right. You’re safe.”
She furrows her brow, moves to sit up, winces when she presses her bandaged hand to the bed.
“Let me help you,” I say.
“Don’t touch me,” she snaps.
I stop, taken aback by the sharpness of her tone. I watch her sit up, groggy.
“My brother. Where is he?” she asks, and I wonder if she remembers that he’s dead.
“His body is at the morgue.” There’s no way around this and I hope to God she remembers.
She nods, looking distant. “We need to bury him,” she says calmly and I’m relieved. “The family will want to pay condolences.”
“When you’re ready. We can do something small.”
She shakes her head. “It’s tradition. The church, then we’ll—”
“It’s okay, Allegra,” I say, coaxing her to relax. “I’ll arrange everything as you want it when you’re ready. Now you need to heal.”
“But… He’s dead. They’re all dead.”
“I know, babygirl. I know.”
It’s silent for a long moment before she speaks again. “No more needles,” she says. “I don’t want to be sedated again.”
“It was meant to help you sleep. To rest so you could heal.”
She rubs her face, looks up at me and shakes her head. “You don’t get it. I’m not resting. I’m just trapped in there. I can’t wake up.” Her eyes fill with tears, but she is quick to swipe them away, angry suddenly. Angry is good. It can be strength. Fear will cripple you. Make a victim out of you. It’s the last thing she wants. I know that.
My fuck up made her into exactly that.
My fuck up left her vulnerable to my enemies.
“Amal and Daniel are safe,” I tell her, hoping that will help.
“Where are they?” she asks, looking relieved at least momentarily.
“With their grandmother in Florida.”
“Grandmother? I didn’t know they had any living grandparents.”
“Malek’s mother, apparently. They’ve been estranged from what I learned.”
“And they’re safe? You’re sure?”
“I don’t think he’d hurt his children. Anyway, I have men watching the house.”
“Can’t you just get them?”
I shake my head. “They’re safer away from here, Allegra.”
She considers this then nods. She looks down at her hand which she’s cradling.
“There’s medicine for the pain,” I say. “You just need to eat a little something first.”
“I’m not hungry.”
“A few bites of toast. Anything.”
She shakes her head, looks away.
“I’m sorry, Allegra.”
She shifts her gaze up to mine, obviously surprised to hear it, but I can see from the way she looks at me that she does not accept the apology. I don’t expect her to. A simple spoken apology does nothing. It doesn’t take back what happened. It doesn’t change the present. Doesn’t promise a future.