Total pages in book: 113
Estimated words: 110113 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 551(@200wpm)___ 440(@250wpm)___ 367(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 110113 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 551(@200wpm)___ 440(@250wpm)___ 367(@300wpm)
Everything I’ve missed out on. I wanna be married too. I wanna raise a bunch of kids too. I know I’m still young and have time to do all that, but I always imagined I’d have that shit figured out by now.
Instead, I feel lonely and more than a little lost.
But that’s some depressing shit, and I don’t have time to be depressed today. I might not have my dream life, but I do have my baby girl. So I take my daughter’s hand and begin to sway to the music, feeling a twinge in my lower back as I hold her on my hip.
Worth it, though. Ella giggles, glancing over her shoulder at the old man playing the steel guitar up on stage. He winks at her, and she buries her head in my chest.
“It’s okay, Ella!” Junie shouts over the music. “He’s just saying hi.”
My eyes find Ava’s and we laugh, the two of us twirling beside each other with our babies on our hips. Ava sings the lyrics while Junie watches her intently, a huge smile on her sweet little face.
The connection they have is obvious. If I had to guess, I’d say Ava is definitely the primary parent—the one who takes on the lion’s share of responsibility. Is her ex a deadbeat? Or does he just have a job that takes him away a lot, the way Lizzie’s does?
Hit. The. Brakes.
Finally, my self-preservation is kicking in. I’m thinking about Ava’s ex way too much. I’m thinking about Ava too much, period. Yeah, we had some really great sex, but we’re still strangers. She made sure I didn’t dig too deep, find out too much. She wanted to keep the encounter as anonymous as possible.
But dancing beside her, our kids between us—this feels anything but anonymous. Especially when Ava sets down Junie, and Ella immediately squirms to get out of my arms. The second I set her down, Junie is grabbing Ella’s hands and trying to twirl her.
Ella, though, refuses to budge. It’s hilarious.
Ava doesn’t miss a beat. Leaning down, she takes one of Junie’s hands and one of Ella’s, and together they rotate in a slow, silly circle that has June in stitches.
It takes a minute for Ella to warm up to the idea. But then June is grabbing her hand, and Ella smiles, and they’re spinning faster and faster. Ava hollers with delight, her eyes catching on mine for a split second before the song ends and she collapses dramatically to the ground.
“Y’all, I’m so dizzy!” she says.
June and Ella fall into the grass beside her in a giggling heap.
“I’m not dizzy,” June replies.
Ella shakes her head. “Me either!”
I nearly die laughing, though, when Ella tries to get up but immediately falls back down.
“Yeah, you’re dizzy,” I say.
She leans her head into Ava’s lap. “Just a little.”
“Yeah, Dad, just a little,” Ava says, patting Ella’s back. “Take all the time you need, sister.”
Something that makes me dizzy? How quickly Ella is warming up to Ava and June. That doesn’t ever happen with my little introvert. Hell, we’re several months into the school year, and only now is Ella able to walk into her classroom without any tears.
Ava just has this warmth about her. It’s magnetic. And really fucking sexy.
But this being real life, the fun comes to an abrupt end when my daughter finally stands up with a look on her face I know well.
“Daddy?”
“Yes, Boo?”
“I think I pooped.”
The familiar clench of frustration in my chest has me biting back a cuss word. “It’s all right. We’re gonna have to head home, though, because you already used the extra pair of undies I brought—”
“I have some extra.” Ava digs a hand into the pocket of her coat and pulls out a tiny pair of pink panties. “Never leave home without ’em.”
I’m grinning like an idiot for more reasons than I can count. “I call BS.”
“What’s BS?” Junie asks.
My face flushes with heat. “Um. I—sorry, I shouldn’t have said—”
“It’s an adult word, that’s all,” Ava replies easily, lips twitching. “Seriously, Sawyer, don’t worry about it. I use adult words far too often myself.”
I run a hand up the back of my head. “I am super smooth today, aren’t I?”
“I got the joke.” Ava passes the undies to Ella. “Set you up real nice for that one.”
We lock eyes.
“Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
A beat of charged silence stretches between us while Ella examines the little butterflies on the underwear.
We really should get going. By the time I get Ella cleaned up and we drive home, she’ll be ready for bath time, and then it’s early to bed. Ella’s had a full day.
Just another epic Saturday night in the Rivers’ household.
Goddamn, I wish I had real plans. Or any plans, really. Ones preferably that involved Ava.
Should I ask her out? Ask for her number at least? I don’t want to scare her off. But I also don’t want to snub the universe after it dropped this incredible woman in my lap not once, but twice now.